Four Points of Reflection

Time Spent in Idle Chit Chat

Today was a quiet day. Beyond the conversation necessary to complete tasks at work and help my daughter with homework, I can't say that I spoke much today. It has been a serene day, almost retreat-like. I also didn't watch that much television. I go through spurts where I watch an endless amount of television from the time I get home from work to the time I go to bed. This can go on nightly for weeks. I notice that I don't feel energized when I'm in the midst of one of these TV marathons. More often than not, I feel drained... even perturbed. Tonight, I can hear the hum of the refrigerator, water running in the apartment upstairs, footsteps above me. My daughter snores lightly. While I often find that I feel exhausted, distracted, and impatient on Mondays, today I feel at peace.

Particular Resistance(s) to my Practice

I feel like I've moved through a long period of resistance. I could watch myself complaining about one thing or another. It felt like a downward spiral... one complaint falling to another in a domino effect.

What Troubled me Most Today

I don't know how to be with people I don't trust.

What Made me Happy Today

Today really was a trouble-free day. The weather was beautiful, the commute smooth and uneventful. It would have been a great day to play hookie and take my daughter to the ball park. She loves baseball. The Tigers won their season opener and it didn't snow. In fact, the sun shone and we could walk around without jackets. It was a good day for ice cream and sandals.

Comments

[Jeff]

I don't know whether it is difficult for you to raise your daughter, but you are very lucky to have her. Sometimes I think having a child would give me a lot to perspective on what is important in life, and would help with loneliness as well.

[chalip]

Sometimes it is difficult. I'm not going to lie. Parenting is one of the hardest jobs I've ever had. But I am very, very lucky. Having my daughter saved my life in a lot of ways...