Four Points of Reflection

Time spent in idle chit chat

I heard from an old friend today. Actually, an ex-boyfriend from my high school days. It had been at least three years since we've been in touch at all. He is moving his business to the next level... leasing space in the city for a web design business. After getting updates on his business and giving him updates on my family, I had to get back to work.

Particular resistance(s) to my practice

Today, it was just getting out of bed. My alarm went off at 5:00 a.m. I got out of bed at 5:40. Attempting this process is uncovering all of my patterns and magnifying them. I already knew that I have a late pattern. There is not much that I show up for on time in my life. I've been hoping that doing this practice will help me to be better about being on the ball in the morning.

What troubled me most today

Writing that last sentence, I noticed something. There is a part of me that practices Zen because I think it will fix me. If I was more flexible (physically), I would be a better person. If I could muster the discipline to sit and just think what I want to think, I would be a better person. There is a big part of me that is doing this practice for me, so I can benefit. What about the world?

What made me happy today

I reached out to a friend today. I recently heard that she is fighting breast cancer, and I'm concerned. I also miss her and wanted her to know about it. I tend to be a loner. I keep to myself. The past year has forced me to challenge myself in this area. It feels good to be in that mode, connecting with people again. I've kept to myself long enough.